


The Love of Two Lifetimes

by Beautiful_River



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: A lot of Hurt, F/F, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, just the way we like it baby
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-18
Updated: 2020-11-18
Packaged: 2021-03-09 20:22:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,724
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27612029
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Beautiful_River/pseuds/Beautiful_River
Summary: It hurt Lucretia to watch you fall in love. She knew she was lucky enough to have your love once, but she couldn't be so lucky again. So she would watch from the sidelines as you fell in love with Johann.
Relationships: Johann the Bard/Reader, Johann/Reader, The Director | Lucretia/Reader
Kudos: 8





	The Love of Two Lifetimes

Lucretia was relieved to find you. She had left you in a very music driven city. When she had invited you to join the Bureau of Balance you were happy too. She was also happy you made quick friends with Johann. Your bubbly personality would do his mopey one some good. She watched as you had laughed at something he said with a wide smile, causing him to crack a small grin. She remembers the ways she felt when you had smiled at her like that and it made her heart sink into her stomach. 

\-----  
She had said something snarky without thinking about it. You stared at her wide eyed then busted out laughing. You were the only one who heard it and the rest of the crew on the star blaster looked at you with surprise. They asked what was so funny and you wiped a tear and told them it was nothing. You smiled wide at her, she blushed and looked away.

She knew it wouldn’t happen again. She was always surprised she had your love. But the circumstances had been different. It was easy to love someone you shared so much trauma with and spent 100 years with. She was younger then, more beautiful she thought. 

She knew you’d be easy friends with Johann but didn’t think you’d fall in love with him so fast. It wasn’t long before she watched you run up to him and place a kiss on his cheek. She didn’t think anything of that, you were a very affectionate person. But when he returned the kiss and intertwined your hands together she knew. She thought she didn’t have the right to be jealous, she did this to herself. 

\-----  
You took her hand in you and kissed her knuckles. She had been sketching the night sky on the beach and you had joined her. “I love you.” You confessed. She was caught off guard. She had similar feelings but didn’t know what to say. She only stared at you. “It’s okay if you don’t feel the same.” You frowned but continued to hold her hand. “I just wanted to tell you.” 

“No I, I uh, do.” She scooted closer to you, scared she said the wrong thing.   
You put your other hand on her cheek and she leaned into the touch.   
“Can I kiss you?” You whispered uncharacteristically nervously. She nodded and you kissed her gently. 

\-----  
When she walked into the fishers chamber she didn’t expect anyone to be there. Unfortunately she found you pressed against the wall, Johann pressed hot needy kisses into your neck. You notice her and gasp. Johann chuckled thinking he had caused the sound to come from you until you pushed him back. His face went from concern to embarrassment when he saw the director. The three of you stood there in awkward silence until she cleared her throat and excused herself. You looked at Johann with a goofy grin. “Shit.” Was all he could laugh out. 

Lucretia had to stop the tears from falling from her eyes as she made her way back to her chambers. 

\-----  
“Beautiful, Gorgeous,” you whispered into the crook of her neck, leaving soft kisses in between each word of praise. 

She couldn’t stop the tears from forming in her eyes as you praised her and worshiped her body. She had never felt so overwhelmed by love before.

You noticed and stopped. “Baby, are you alright? Do you need me to stop?”

“No,” she whispered, grabbing your biceps holding you close. “Please, more.” She almost sobbed. 

\-----  
“I’m sorry about…” you trailed off. You weren’t sure why you were apologizing the next time you were in her office. “It was… unprofessional of us.” 

She stared you down with a sorrowful face. “Never mind that,” she dismisses it and begins to talk to you about why she had called you in. 

\-----  
She noticed you seemed anxious about something which was very unlike you. “Darling what’s wrong?” She pulled you into her room away from the rest of the crew. 

Your eyes grew wide. “Shit, I…” you laughed and pulled her into a hug. “I know you can read me like a book.” She just stared at you concerned.

You ran your hand across the back of your neck. “I was gonna... I had a whole thing planned but I just...” You let out a sigh and a small laugh. You reached into your pocket and got down on one knee, pulling out a small velvet box. 

Her hand covered her mouth. 

“Will you?” You laughed tears in your eyes. “I mean, you mean the world to me and this would-“

“Yes.” She sobbed before giving you such a strong hug she pulled you both to the floor. You laughed. 

“Wait, let me put the ring on,” you giggled as she covered your face with kisses. “Lucy,” you kissed her back. 

“I love you.” She sighed content. 

“I love you too.” 

\-----  
The director noticed Taako yelling, of course she did. He looked over to where he stood with you, and your face was bright red. He was holding your hand and hollering about a ring. 

“Who knew my man had such good taste?” Taako hollered.

“In rings or women?” You laughed.

“Both!” Taako exclaims.

“Congratulations!” Magnus boomed beside him. 

“We weren’t going to tell anyone yet, so please keep it quiet.” You giggled. 

“I believe congratulations are in order.” Lucretia solemnly says as she approaches your small group that was gathered on the sidewalk. 

Your hand slipped from Taakos to behind your back. 

“Thank you ma’am.” You frowned and looked at the ground. She continued past you, her heart beating fast, tears threatened to fall from her eyes.

“What was that about?” Merle asked.

“If I’m honest? I think she hates me.” You shrugged. The rest of your conversation became too far away for her to hear. 

\-----  
She remembers how her heart felt like it would jump out of her chest when she saw you. You felt the same way about her. Lup gave you the rings. Merle did a short reading. Magnus cried. You said “I do,” and kissed. The crew cheered as the sun warmed your skin and your heart felt over joyed. 

\-----  
Lucretia almost didn’t show up for the small wedding. You felt obligated to invite her. It was thanks to her you had even met Johann. A small group of friends and acquaintances filled the small chapel on the moon base. You looked maybe even more beautiful than you had on your wedding day with Lucretia. More mature, more worldly. 

Carrie gave you the rings. Merle did a short reading. Magnus cried. Johann tucked a piece of hair behind your ear before he kissed you. Everyone cheered. Lucretia forced herself to smile and clap. She wanted nothing more than for you to be happy, even if it wasn’t with her. 

\-----  
Magnus knows now isn’t the time to tell you, later when this is over. But he knows, your love was dead on the floor and he saw it happen. He also saw your love in front of you being threatened by him and Taako. You were beside yourself tears blurring your vision as you sobbed. Barry pulled you back to your feet, telling you now isn't the time. 

When things were starting to calm Magnus pulled you to the side. He had to tell you something. 

You remember falling to your knees with a yell, crying. When you opened your eyes you were in your room back on the moon base. Had all that been a dream? Your door opens and Magnus lets himself in. He gives you a glass of water. “That was all real, wasn't it.” You take in a shaky breath. 

“I’m sorry.” Is all he can say. He holds you while you cry. When your sobs die down, he says Lucretia really wants to see you. You tell him you don’t know if you’re ready for that. 

He says he understands and you tell him you want to be alone. He tells you to call her on your stone of farspeach when you’re ready to see her. Magnus is gone for all but a minute when the walls feel like they are closing around you. You scramble for your stone. All you get out is a soft “Luce,” before you sob. It’s not long before there’s a knock at your door. You hurry to open it and you are greeted by and out of breath Lucretia. Your Lucretia. Lucy, Luce, Cretia. You both stand silent in the doorway. 

“Lucy.” You finally sob. 

You can see she’s crying too. All she can do is apologize. You grab her hand and pull her into a hug, and close the door behind her. You cry into her shoulder as she strokes your hair and whispers sweet nothings. 

Your sobs start to calm and she kisses your forehead. You pull away and place your hand over your heart and mouth. She apologizes again not knowing that was over stepping. 

You want to look at her but her eyes are glued to the floor. 

“I don’t want to be alone tonight, but I don’t think,” you start to say. 

“I can tell Magnus to come back.” She offers.

“That'd be nice.” You whispered.

A few minutes later Magnus is back in your room and you're cuddled to his chest. This had been common practice on cycles where you both felt very alone and you had lost Lucretia. 

“Why isn’t,” Magnus starts to ask.

“I couldn’t, this was our bed.” You whisper. 

He held you close. “I know what you mean. After Julia I don’t think I could.” 

“I don’t know what I’m going to do.” You started to cry again.

Magnus hushed you. “You don’t have to decide right now. Don’t think about it. Just rest.” 

So you did. In the morning he invited you to breakfast with everyone. You told him you weren’t ready. 

Magnus wished he had stayed with you because breakfast was extremely awkward. When everyone was going their separate ways Lucretia pulled Magnus aside and asked about you.

“You have to give her time. She just lost the love of her life.” He stopped himself when he saw her frown. “Her love of this life. And you might want to be prepared for the chance she might…”

“I know.” She sighed. 

“After Julia I could never.” Magnus put a hand on her shoulder. 

The thought had passed her mind. That maybe you wouldn’t want her back. And you had every right to not.

Throughout that day everyone made a visit to you. You really wished you could have given Lup and hug, but Barry worked as a step in. 

That night you made your way over to the Star Blaster. You got goosebumps as you stepped onto the ship. This had been home for 100 years but it felt so strange.   
You ran your hands over the familiar railing and walls, following the halls to your old room. 

Inside everything was how you remember. Two beds pushed together. The art you had collected with Lucretia on the wall, the few things she made for you were hung up as well. You made your way over to the bed and felt the familiar sheets. You jumped when a voice startled you. 

“I’m sorry I didn’t know you’d be in here.” Lucretia sighs leaning against the door frame. 

You turn around and look at her. Really look at her, for the first time in a long time. The lines of her face are heavier, older. Eyes are more sunken. She’s taller, shoulders broader, lips still plump and hair still curly. Your heart gives a little flip. 

“I thought you hated me.” You looked down at the bed. 

“I… why?” She frowned.

“Every time I talked to you, you would frown, and you were so cold.”

“It hurt me to watch you. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be cold. I was… Jealous.” She balls her fists up. “I didn’t have the right to be but I was.” 

“What we have was different.” You say. “Johann and I.” There’s a silence. “That doesn’t mean I don’t still love you, I just,” you paused thinking. “Need some time I guess.” Your voice broke with the end of the sentence. 

“I understand,” she whispered.

You sat down on the edge of the bed. This was your side. Your night stands being more messy than Lucretia's side.

You picked up a trinket, a small jewel decorated like a turtle. 

“Do you remember? When I gave that to you?” She hesitates to ask.

You sniff back a tear. “I do. I thought it was so sweet I cried. You were scared because that was so unlike me. I can’t seem to stop now.” 

“I, darling, I…” she stops herself at the pet name. 

You look up at her with tears running down your face. 

“Lucy, I really did miss you.” You manage a small sad smile. 

Now it’s her turn to cry. You pat the bed next to you and she sits, you pull her into a hug. “Twelve years is a long time to be alone.” You feel her sob. You hold her as she cries. 

You spend the night together in your old bedroom. You sleep on separate sides, untouching. 

The next few months go by in a blur. Some nights are spent alone in your room, crying over your lost love. Some nights are too much and Magnus happily takes you into his arms. Only two nights do you go to Lucretia and sleep in her room.

Everyone was gathered for dinner one night and this time you join them. Your heart fills with joy having everyone together again. Seeing your family smile and laugh. But your heart is also sad with the side glances Lucretia revives from Taako. You know he won’t easily forgive her. Everyone seems very tense with her. 

“Happy to see you smiling, bubellah.” Taako slides onto the couch next to you.

“Thanks,” you sigh. “It feels good. I thought maybe I wouldn’t be able to again.” 

“You?” Taako giggles. “You have the brightest smile of anyone on the Star Blaster.” He told you in a rare moment of sincerity. 

“Thanks.” Is all you can say. 

“He’s right.” Lucretia is smiling at you. 

You can see Taako scowl at her and her smile wavers. 

Taako gets up abruptly. “Who’s ready for dessert?” Magnus and Merle cheer.

You look over at Lucretia and offer her a sad sympathetic smile. She smiles back at you. 

When everyone heads home for the night you leave with Lucretia. You hadn’t moved out of your room you shared with Johann yet. You weren’t ready. Even though everyone had offered to let you stay with them. You're lost in thought as you land back on the old moon base. 

“Goodnight.” Lucretia says as you exit the pod. 

“I’ll walk you to your room.” You say and start walking that way. You walk in silence until you reach her door. She wishes you good night again and goes to walk into her room but you grab her hand and stop her. 

“I forgive you.” You whisper.

“No, you don’t have to.” She smiles sadly. 

“But I do. Honestly. Lucretia.” You squeeze her hand and look her in the eyes. 

She looks back, only to start crying, you can see her body shake. You pull her into a hug and step into the room closing the door. You begin to cry too. 

“I hate this.” You confessed. “I hate feeling so awful about everything. I just want to go back to how it was.”

“I’m sorry I took that from you. If Johann has been able to see the hunger he would have-,”

You put a finger over her lips. “I meant I want to go back to us, Luce. I’m still healing from all this, but I really really miss us.”

“You’d take me back? After everything?”

You nod.

“Even with how much I’ve aged?” She looks at the ground. 

You run a gentle hand over her face and smile. “You’re beautiful.” You hesitate at first but lean in and kiss her cheek. “Gorgeous.” You kiss her again. 

That night I spent in Lucretia's bed, wrapped in each other’s arms.

**Author's Note:**

> Dont ask me where I got the idea for this from because I couldn't tell you. I wrote this originally as a drabble but i liked it enough to edit it. I just really love all the characters in Balance and would marry any one of them. Also Im p sure this is the first time I've written a story with a F/F ship??? Which is wild considering my gay ass. Child anyways, IDK how people will feel about this but I hope yall like it please let me know if the two different relationship things is too wild. 
> 
> Check out my page for more TAZ/Reader content. ( Mainly Duck and Magnus)


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